Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Is It a Bad Thing?

Just suppose there was a person who lived in a house with an upstairs and a basement. And say this person had a burst of energy and decided to wash clothes for her kind and loving hubby (who, by the way, lives in the same house with the upstairs and the basement). And what if this 1st person (not to be confused with the 2nd person - kind and loving hubby - who will enter this hypothetical situation later) has an electric clothes washing machine located in the upstairs portion of this hypothetical house said person lives in (with her kind and loving hubby). And just suppose said 1st person happens to put the soap in the washer, turn the water on and then methodically put the dirty clothes into said soapy water so the washer can begin to do her chore for her. Say this person, since the bulk of her energy has now been consumed, decides it would be a good idea to go into the basement portion of said house to now sit on her butt and relax for a few minutes.

Now, suppose while this person (still 1st person) is relaxing, a strange gurgling noise begins to sound forth from the pipes that Cal's Mickey Mouse building crew built into the walls of said house. And what if this noise becomes so obnoxious that it interrupts the soothing silence said person was basking in to the point that said person is forced to rise off her butt and investigate. And, just suppose, that upon said person entering the small kitchen in the basement portion of said house 1st person sees water bubbling up in the sink at precisely the same time it can be heard draining from the electric washing machine in the upstairs portion of said house.

Would this be a bad thing?

Now, what if, after this hypothetical person works her hypothetical batwings (if the person is hypothetical so are the batwings, saddlebags and ugly knees, right????) ... anyway ... works her batwings to a sweaty pulp plunging the sinks in the kitchen located in the basement portion of the house so that the water bubbles and goes down the drain - like water is supposed to do.

That would be a good thing, right?

Now, what if cocky said person - thinking the problem was a fluke and has been solved by her brawny powers - continues on with her goal of washing yet another batch -- count them, that's two (2) batches -- of dirty clothes for her kind and loving hubby? And suppose said person then cooks a romantic dinner for two (scrambled eggs by the light of the tv) and then what if said person returns to the portion of the house that is upstairs to put on her exercise clothes so she can hypothetically exercise away her hypothetical body fat and, while doing so, said kind and loving hubby (2nd person) comes barging in to inform said 1st person he has stopped the electric clothes washer because the drains must be plugged. Now what if kind and loving hubby goes back into the basement portion of the house with not-so-cocky 1st person following and what if said 1st person were to happen to spy with her two little eyes two huge stainless steel bowls full of dirty water sitting on the counter, with perhaps two sinks full of dirty water and, venturing further a gurgling, bubbling, oozing floor drain, a flooding toilet and perhaps even a bathroom sink with residue from something resembling dirty water floating around in it. And then perhaps this person might even see towels spread around the floor soaking up reflections of dirty water.

Would this be a bad thing, too?

Thank goodness, after more plunging and mopping and thinking and wondering if RotoRooter is open 24 hours a day and more plunging and thinking, kind and loving hubby magically made the water go away with a bottle of something purchased from his store! And thank goodness said first person has plenty of black juice in the fridge for just such an evening because, spacial spaztic or not, two bad things tend to equal a shaky night.

And there you have Wednesday night in a nutshell - or should I say a stainless steel bowl?


  1. Let's see...who is said person #1. Let's hear it for black juice! That's all I can say. If I were said person #1 I would have been hysterical in my calm and soothing way. Said person #1's line of thought makes total sense to me. You'd think we might be related.

  2. Tonight person #1 told person #2 that he needs to bring some more of the magical drain opener juice home and put in the storage room in the event that the stinky water reappears in the basement sink. I was impressed with how it opened uo the drain. Lots cheaper that rotorooter. Person #2