Friday, August 13, 2010

Might As Well Get It In Print

Okay, this comic doesn't fit totally but when I read it, it fit enough.

I don't know as typing it will make it any less difficult for me but . . . here goes.

Joe and Mandy are moving to Manti.

I've bawled until the early hours of the morning on several occassions. And YES I'm well aware there is no - ABSOLUTELY NONE - sympathy for me because four hours is nothing compared to distant states and totally out of the country. But that doesn't mean my heart doesn't still ache for what it feels it is losing. And that doesn't mean I can't still cater my own Pity Party!

Joe shared his thoughts that I hadn't appreciated having my grandkids all so close. I don't think he meant it the way it came across but I've been in the depths of self-loathing thinking I am now being punished because I didn't do enough to show I really did appreciate the great blessing I had. Will I ever figure out where I was lacking? Are there second chances or will I always be their long distance grandma? Wrong and warped I know but my feelings, just the same. And, given time and patience, I will process these feelings and move on. I may, at the very least, have to change some of the quotes on my blog as it seems it was some of them that spurred Joseph on to take his family and leave his {and their} comfort zone! And, it seems me babysitting for them while they went to the Temple was another clincher. What was I thinking???

HOWEVER, this is an AWESOME growth opportunity for Joseph, and for the whole family. And what mother doesn't want her children to be the best they can be at whatever good venture they choose? I pray for it every night for all my kids. I'll just have to start being more specific in the parameters from now on!

As of September 7, 2010, Joseph will be working with Neal S. Magleby & Sons Mortuary which services Richfield, Salina and Manti. They've been looking for someone to man the operations in the more northern part of their service area and Joe was the one they wanted. Since the buy-out at his current place of employment, he has been actively looking for other opportunities and this one pretty well fell in his lap.

I'm thinking it's not always instinctive for mothers and grandmothers to

know how to stay with the nest after the babies have flown away!

The kids will most definitely flourish in the small town environment and they can have more animals and enjoy more of the farm life that they have tried to have in Smithfield. And they're getting down there in time to start school with everyone else and not have it be blatently obvious that they're the 'new kids' in town.  Hunting will be easier and more convenient, too. The way everything has fallen into place proves how right the decision is for them. They were even able to sell their house within a week of putting the sign up.

And, if I were to be honest with myself, I've seen it coming. The Lord has been mindful of me in preparing me for it without telling me specifically what was around the corner. I have been able to create a beautiful bond with Mandy over the last nine months and I know it's been for a reason. I've seen firsthand Joe's dissatisfaction with his means of supporting his family and how he's turned it inward. So, now, I have the option of continuing to feel abandoned and overlooked and 'weighed, measured and found wanting' {from a Knight's Tale}, basically ignoring the foundation Heavenly Father has laid for me, or I can choose to embrace the challenges of learning a new phase of mother-in-lawhood and Grandmotherhood. I choose the latter. Hesitantly, but I still choose it.

And know that I will personally be paying the salary of several UPS or USPS {maybe both} workers from now on. I may have to buy stock in Exxon. Maybe I'll have to invest in decent web cameras so I can keep in touch that way, too. Might as well make use of this technology stuff. That way I can keep track of Mandy as she measures the kids for their Christmas pjs! My hearing is so weird that phone calls are difficult. I'm open to any suggestions for long distance Grandmothering.


  1. Heartfelt feelings from a GREAT mother and grandmother. Such a good example of how changing our thinking can make us see things differently.
    I love you, Janis!

  2. Okay, now that you have your spurs on and have cowboyed up, just remember you can always say "what" and "please repeat that" on the phone, or "spell that for me", or anything that helps you understand what they are saying. Hearing problems come from both sides of the family. A guilt trip is the last thing in the world you need. I think Joe was offering a little fun pun with his comment. He appreciates you. It definitely is the Lord's will they way things have turned out for them. They will be greatly blessed and so will you. Just don't follow them and move closer or they will up and move again. That's just the way it is. We hardly get to see Travis and Rose and kids so it has been like our kids were. They hardly knew their grandmothers and cousins like you and Sue did. That's just life and that's the way it is, and it is what it is! I love your acceptance of their decision and it shows that you know it is right for them. You are always in my prayers. Love, Sharon