Friday, October 8, 2010

Validation . . . I Think!

Yeah, I felt pretty well normal, hunky-dory, peachy-keen, awesomer than awesome and just plain "okay" after reading the above comic. I'm not disjointed or off-the-wall: I'm just overly adaptable to my life in general and, specifically, every little thing that happens in my life.

Please keep this newly gained knowledge in mind as it justifies not only this blog post but the majority of my posts.

I was trying to watch a particular television channel tonight. It has reruns of Criminal Minds, Without a Trace and NCIS on it so I frequent the channel's assigned frequency frequently. However, it's evidently a broadcasting company that doesn't have a whole lot of money in high places because the slightest anomaly in the weather or the atmosphere has negative effects on the quality of the picture. The screen suddenly turns into a menagerie of tiny digital squares dancing around the screen hoping to find their proper place so the viewer can actually tell what the picture is supposed to be. Kind of like the American Flag scene in Pollyanna where each girl is wrapped in a different portion of the flag and they're scrambling to get in the right order so they actually look like the flag.

Anywho, it's been stormy all week so chances of watching anything on this station has been slim pickins. Tonight was no exception. I'm a die-hard, though, and I hate to let something as inanimate, abstract and intangible as air waves win so I watch the mixed-up screen for awhile {longer than the normal person would}, hoping it will improve.

Tonight I wondered if I was watching me, though. Would I be shocked if suddenly all the little boxes found their places and the picture I was staring at was actually ME? Wow. Maybe this is what I look like when I'm out of sync with what I know I should be doing and not totally in tune with what my Heavenly Father is trying to prep me for. Do I ever come close to having all the pieces slide into their respective places at the same time?

Yeah. There have been snapshot moments where I felt like I was the Cat's Meow and that my life couldn't get any better. I need to figure out what I, personally, was doing at those times that allowed me to make sense of all the little boxy fragments floating around and actually see my life the way Heavenly Father was seeing it. Looking at the picture on the lid of the jigsaw puzzle box sort of gives me an electrical jump start when I'm stalled putting a puzzle together; reinforcing in my mind what all these scattered pieces are supposed to look like when they are joined.


When there are more little boxy picture fragments than large screen images, the sound doesn't stick around, either. So, of course, as I was watching the screen tonight, I wondered if the fragmentation I feel in my life is in direct proportion to the ability I have to hear the promptings and comfortings and soothings and warnings of the Comforter. Even having the closed caption function on doesn't help. If any words flash across the screen at all, they're a conglomeration of random letters that make no sense. I would need one of those cool decoder rings you used to be able to get in the box of Corn Flakes.

And, if the channel goes really bad, the screen will go totally black and an error message will display across the middle that says, "Digital channel signal strength is low". My signal strength is low a lot of the time. I need to figure out what or who I'm allowing to weaken the signal and mess with the quality of my reception. I always picture myself back in New Testament times and I'm like the woman who knows she just needs to touch the hem of the Savior's robe to be cured and healed and perfected. She made her way through the throng and accomplished her desire. Too often I allow myself to be pushed back {why????} allowing petty, worldly things to come between me and the tangible display of my faith.

I don't think I'm as bad as this TV channel gets when storms are brewing in the atmosphere outside. But there are storms and spotty bad weather and I lose sight of how all the pieces are supposed to fit together. I even go so far as to question if I have the right puzzle pieces in my box {or all of them for that matter} or if I have the right antenna on the roof to properly receive signals.

I'm not sure there was even a point to be made here. Just my disjointed thoughts, I guess. Again.


  1. Your points were right on!!! I have been thinking about the same thing lately... I think that sometimes satan holds the scramble button and loves to see us squirm...and at the same time the Lords likes it to because he sees us fall on our knees and suplicate him... I am grateful that there is help in putting the puzzle back together...Love you Mom!

  2. I keep wondering if somebody up there pushes buttons. UMMMMMM.

  3. I don't know if somebody up there pushes buttons, but somebody up there blessed Janis with a great "thinker". My brain would never reach such heights. Love to read your blogs.