Friday, January 28, 2011

The Evolution of Transportation

I remember doing a report on a similar topic in middle school or something. I copied pictures of the horse and buggy and trains and the first vehicles and, of course, an Edsel. That was a report on the evolution of transportation over years and years, though. I was just sitting here thinking how things have evolved just over the last few weeks. In my life, anyway. So, here's my report:

This represents my usual mode of transportation for almost six years, up until that fateful Tuesday morning. I have this much in my possession thanks to an observant Nate & Krisy who saw it off the side of the road several days later. If you look closely, there are actually tire tracks across it. I find it interesting someone could run over a significant portion of a car door - my car door, no less - and keep going.

Then, I got to upgrade to Alan's Burgundy Baby. Even when I had to hoist myself up in it with my horrible knees, it was an awesome ride. But, alas, all good things must come to an end or be shared or given back or something like that.

So now I've been downgraded {'downgraded' is too mild - it's more like 'squashed-to-the-root-bottom-of-the-food-chain'} to Alan's Blue Beast. Before he left town, he casually mentioned he'd unintentionally put out a huge chunk of change at the gas station to fill the Beast with gas. I took that as an open invitation to go wherever I dared. So, I made a run to Logan last night. I Am Woman, right??? Did I mention the heater doesn't work? And I had to actually find the switch and manually turn on the headlights! And don't even bring up all the effort and pulled muscles I have from having to actually "roll" down the windows and manually lock the doors! Of course, the beauty-full shell accenting the bed {held there, by the way, with six hardware store caliber C-clamps} is definitely a boost to the feeling of owning the road while I'm behind the wheel . . . that is if you consider not being able to see anything but your reflection reflecting back through layers of glass and Plexiglas prisms fundamental to 'owning the road'!

However, Wednesday's mail brought me a most wonderful surprise. {Surprise probably isn't the best word since I made the selection and placed the order. I obviously knew what it was.}  I'd say it's a more eye-appealing mode of transportation than the Blue Beast! Too bad I'm surrounded by main highways and speeding traffic or I would put these to better, more productive and more consistent use. However, I can already hear - yes, hear - the Fashion Nazi rolling their eyes! Anyway, I ordered this stunning pair of walking shoes, hoping for fruition of all that was promised.

{Shape Ups will get you fit while you walk, work, shop, and can retrain your muscles, helping you walk with a positive impact . . .change the way you approach your daily activities . . .will enhance the way you feel and look; muscles get toned, calories are burned and your posture improves. Shape Ups are designed to: Promote weight loss; Strengthen the back; Firm calf and buttock muscles; Reduce cellulite and tone your thighs; Increase cardiovascular health; Improve posture; and Reduce stress on knee and ankle joints.} 

Honestly who could resist a sales pitch like that? Kind of like "A ring by spring", huh, Amber? As anyone will attest, I have a million pairs of shoes {strategically placed throughout the house} but none of them cost over $10. I spent a little more on these but, let me tell you, so far, it has been worth the investment! And, drum roll please, my new shoes actually came with an instructional DVD!

Yes! Progress being what it is and all, I have always wondered if the right shoe still went on the right foot or if I was tying my shoes in the correct manner {is it the bunny's ears run around the tree or what?}. Actually I haven't watched the DVD yet. Something rubs me wrong when I think of having to have instructions on how to accurately put my shoes on and then how to walk. {Okay, well, maybe the 'how to walk' part.}

That's my evolutionary story of the past couple of weeks. At least I didn't evolve to flying on a pig!

1 comment:

  1. I'm sorry for all your dillyemmas. You know the saying, "when it rains, it pours". I am so glad no one got hurt in your accident. Take care of those knees. I can't believe how much fluid was taken out. Hang in there, "it's not over until the fat lady sings". Oh, my, what did I just say? Love your blog, but most importantly you.