Friday, November 4, 2011

Life's Lessons Locations - 4th in a multi-part series

I was watching a couple of grandkids play this afternoon and decided to start sweeping off the patio since LOML was cleaning up stuff, too. Yup. It's that time of year when the patio gets turned into the boat dock.

The wind was blowing. I started sweeping. Nothing really happened. Then I realized I was sweeping into the wind and everything I was sweeping off was being blown back. Then I chuckled because I remembered one of the many of life lessons I learned from our stint as yard work workers. I decided it was time for another installment in that infamous collection.

No one believes me when I tell them that when I was a little girl, I had to mow the lawn with a mower that didn't have an engine mounted on it. I was the engine. I don't think they doubt that there were once mowers without engines. I just think they're amazed that the wheel had been invented when I was a little girl. I'm happy to report the wheel had been invented and there were two of them on that mower.


There are the basic lessons that, for the most part come quickly. Of course, there is always the refresher course at the beginning of each new season. Common sense things like don’t stand on Nellie’s blind side while she’s raking, remember to take a wide path around the hitch on the truck, check the weather forecast before setting out, give Joseph plenty of space for his antics on the rider, ask what beverage is in the Hart's mug BEFORE you take a big swig and last but not least, make sure everyone has gone to the bathroom before setting out.

  1. Contrary to popular beliefs, fads, fetishes, etc., it is possible to have too many lawn gnomes {and squirrels and rabbits and various other cute little plaster animals}. Too much clutter to maneuver around definitely makes the job more difficult.

  2. The amount of time it takes to push, scrape, shovel, or sweep grass clippings out of the truck bed at the dump is directly equivalent to how many times {and how many people joined you} as you jumped in it, packing it down so just one more lawn's clippings would fit in.

  3. The length of time it takes to empty the truck bed of clippings is not only equivalent to the amount of tromping that took place but the longer it takes to empty the truck bed is even more equal to the strength of the moldy grass odor which will permeate every pore of your skin before said truck bed is empty.

  4. No matter how much maintenance is performed at home before taking off, at least one piece of machinery will break, requiring the CEO of the business to 'tinker' until, wallah! Said broken piece of machinery will miraculous be fixed at precisely the same time the other employees have finished the immediate job.

  5. Going around the outside of a section makes mowing it a lot easier. You have established boundaries and know precisely what your responsibility is. The younger the kids were, the more LOML and I had to establish these boundaries. It kept them from mowing down flower beds and flipping gravel and other oddities that may injure them.

  6. Piggy backing on #5, don't eat the whole elephant in one bite. Tackle one section of grass, one dump of the bag at a time.

  7. Don't be afraid to dance in the rain. It doesn't make the grass any easier to cut but it sure keeps everyone entertained and keeps your mind off of how wet you're getting.

  8. Wind will blow the heck out of the best made plans. You can either sit down, do nothing and wait for the wind to stop or you can just duck your head and plow into the job in an attempt to ignore the wind or you can pause, study the wind and figure out how to work with it and use it to your advantage. {the power raking memories the wind blew up while sweeping the patio}.

  9. It's easier, takes less time and is less frustrating to mow a lawn once a week than fight your way through overgrown weeds, clogged lawnmower chutes and broken weed whacker line when mowing it on a not-so-consistent basis.

  10. If it's important to you to fertilize during the winter, don't complain when the lawn needs to be mowed in March!

So, there you have it. Lessons learned, memories made.

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